Review of my website dashboard revealed this post from a couple years ago… I wrote it, but held too much fear and pain in my heart to publish it at that time. I’ve grown since then… but it still may have value to those working through similar processes. Sending love and blessings for your journey…
Scarcity and Abundance – Patterns of Perception and Response
Growing up in a family with a predominate viewpoint of scarcity was certainly a challenge – but also a blessing. My family taught me how to work – how to be industrious and creative in solving problems of daily life. But looking over my mother’s shoulder as she struggled to pay the monthly bills also taught me that money was something always in short supply. I determined early on that if I wanted to have anything in this world, I would need to work for it – and I did so with great strength, courage and enthusiasm. I held the certainty and hope that hard work would bring me things I wanted to have and a certain amount of worldly riches, or at least enough resources for basic support and comfort.
Growing up in a family with a religious heritage was also a challenge – and a blessing. I seemed to come into this world with my own strong sense of the worth of souls and the value of service to others. The religious training I received from being raised as a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints has supported my deep sense of spirituality and added depth and richness to all of my life experiences.
But there were also inner conflicts aplenty, which seem to have originated from habitual family patterns of reacting to life challenges from a perspective of fear and scarcity rather than responding from a space of love and abundance.
Therein lies my quest – to honor and appreciate the goodness of my family heritage and to release and let go of old patterns and perceptions that have kept me stuck for years in scarcity and pain.
I cannot tell the whole story of my journey to a life of generosity and abundance in one blog post. But I can share one small episode as an example.
Recently, I became aware that someone I cared about was resentful of us. It appeared that he had the impression that we were “rolling in the dough”, but wouldn’t help him in his financial trials. He had no clue that we were going through the same economic storm as everyone else we knew – and not faring very well.
When I learned of his opinion, I was triggered. My anger flared dramatically. I was immediately offended that he set himself up to judge us as unworthy of affluence. He had no true knowledge of our efforts to grow and expand beyond who we were and try to become “successful”, only to see it all wiped away during the economic downturn, and have to start all over again.
My husband saw how the conversation triggered me. He touched my arm lovingly, and whispered in my ear that the conversation was not meant to hurt either of us, but just to be an opening for improved communication. I grew silent and kept the rest of my thoughts to myself as I realized that the real problem was my emotional flare – something in me was definitely triggered by this conversation.
My thought process:
What is the real reason for this person’s resentment?
Have I actually caused him any harm? No.
It appears that our offense was to work hard to try to overcome scarcity mentality.
We were successful for a while, then seemingly, not.
All our hard work did not “pay off” and bring us “riches” as we had been taught as children that it would…
At least, not for the the long term.
But even then, why would this person be angry if we did achieve “success”?
Isn’t that what we all were encouraged to work toward?
And even deeper than that, why did his opinion even matter?
Why was I triggered emotionally?
Trying to make sense of what was going on inside my own psyche, I turned to The Body Code app and began using my muscle testing skills to discover some deeper answers.
“Is there an underlying reason for this flare of anger?
The Body Code led me to Energies > Post Traumatic > Inflammation
Underlying the inflammation energy were twin causes, 1) an addictive heart energy and 2) an energy of parasitic pathogens.
My intuition kicked in, and I muscle tested further, verifying the thoughts and memories that flooded into my consciousness.
The inflammation and parasitic energy were intertwined, and related to the perception of never-ending scarcity.
My scarcity beliefs began with an addictive heart energy inherited from my mother before I was born. Mother evidently experienced some kind of deprivation and fear while she was carrying me, and that energy was passed on to me at my birth. This distorted belief was then proven “true” by early childhood experiences (ask me some time about “Life Savers vs Tootsie Rolls”), and later childhood experiences of never enough money and not being deserving of receiving or spending money. I also discovered a deeper and darker sub-conscious belief that my very existence was not a blessing to my parents, but instead, that I was perceived as a burden, physically and financially. I believed myself to be a financial parasite to my parents – an “unprofitable servant” so to speak. Hence, my addictive heart energy of feeling desperate for love, my willingness to do anything anyone asked of me even if it was harmful to me, and the underlying belief of being undeserving and worthless. Oh, how I groan as I see how these negative patterns have played out in my life!
Even while I have been successful in many things, these and other inner conflicts have held me back from becoming all I can be. Sigh…
Let me be clear about one thing.
My parents never consciously intended for me to be hurt, or to cause any inner conflicts. I think they wanted me to be rich and happy, and while they taught me how to work, they didn’t truly believe I could ever really achieve anything substantial because I am a girl, and therefore in their world view, incapable of success or wealth building. I think they thought that for me to ever be rich, I would have to “marry money”.
Subsequently, I grew up with a self sabotaging psyche. I worked hard. I tried to work smart. I created a certain level of financial and business success, but not knowing how to manage during the economic meltdown, self-sabotaged myself right out of the abundance I had created. It was a nightmare to actually experience that self-fulfilling prophecy of scarcity.
Is there a real way out of this quandary of inner conflicts, self-defeating behaviors, and feeling like an unwanted vagabond on the face of the earth?
Yes, of course there is.
Everything begins with energy…
The energy of spirit…
The energy of thought…
The energy of emotion…
The energy of response…
The energy of choice…
The energy of action…
The energy of manifestation….
There is much more to share…
“Come along with me, the best is yet to be.”….
Today I completed a 28 Day Gratitude Practice…
28 days of focused attention to blessings great and small…
What I appreciate most about the experience is that
my morning meditative self talk focus has shifted from
“what do I need to clear” (focused on the past) to
“what am I grateful for”… (focused on the present)…
And in the present moment,
I am laying the foundation for future moments…
of greater gratitude and joy.
I have been trying to resolve some physical health issues,
and knowing that there is an underlying mental, emotional, energetic
component to every disease and disorder,
I have developed the habit of waking up each day,
searching my mind for what I need to clear out of my psyche…
That “clearing” practice has been helpful in digging up and airing out
long forgotten unpleasant experiences, and allowing the biochemistry processing to complete…
But at some point, my habitual thought pattern became so focused on past wounds that I forgot to appreciate that I don’t live in my past anymore…
And I am much better served by being grateful,
in the present moment,
for blessings great and small…
Habits of thought are created through repetition, so, with the help of some special friends, I employed Rhonda Byrne’s “The Magic” (book 3 in the series of “The Secret”) as the structure for my 28 Day Gratitude Practice.
The first time through, I created the structure for our practice in the Facebook group, but my actual personal practice fizzled out…
Until one of my friends said “Let’s start this up again.”
This time, I am so happy to report that I completed each of the 28 Day Gratitude Practice prompts, with full purpose of heart…
and The Magic truly began to happen!
My energy lightened.
My spirits lifted.
I began looking for things to be grateful for.
I focused on noticing the joy…
And as I did, more joyful things appeared!
New clients showed up – effortless abundance!
I found the energy to deep clean my home – definite progress!
I received unexpected checks in the mail – a welcome surprise!
Today I woke up with gratitude phrases in my mind…
and found my body beginning to cooperate gently and joyfully…
“Thank you for my strong, healthy body.”
“Thank you for full range of motion.”
“Thank you for full relaxation.”
“Thank you for standing tall and walking strong.”
“Thank you for all the love in my life.”
As I write this post, a children’s song comes to mind…
from the Children’s Songbook…
one that I taught my own little ones…
a song of saying thank you… thank you… thank you…
a song of receiving divine love…
“Children All Over the World”
All over the world at the end of day, Words: Peggy Hill Ryskamp, b. 1949. © 1975 IRI
Heav’nly Father’s children kneel down and pray,
Each saying thank you in his own special way,
Saying thank you, thank you in his own special way.
“Wir danken dir.” (veer don-ken deer)
All over the world tender voices hear.
Some say “tak,” (tahk)
others “merci,” (mare-see)
“Kansha shimasu,” (kahn-shah shee-mah-sue)
We thank thee.
Our Heavenly Father hears them;
He understands each tongue.
Our Heav’nly Father knows them;
He loves them,
Music: Beth Groberg Stratton, b. 1944. © 1975 IRI
Children’s Songbook of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints
The Law of Mirrors
Lesson from The Law of Mirrors: Recently, a client stopped making the promised payments for services he had already received. As money was tight and I don’t particularly enjoy accounting and management of finances, I reached out and expressed my frustration to some of my Facebook friends, saying, “It is said that when the student is ready, the teacher / or lesson appears. I’m enduring a lesson right now that I don’t much like. Wonder what I’m supposed to learn from it. UGH.”
As expected, some of my cherished SoulPrint friends responded supportively:
“You and me both, Jo Lyn! LOLOL! We’ll get it, eventually! Until then, just do what you LOVE!!!!”
“Hang in there! Sometimes it’s complicated. Sometimes it’s to develop discernment of preference.”
“Everything will be good, Jo Lyn Cornelsen! In time the message will reveal itself.”
Encouraged by that loving support, I chose to trust that I would soon understand the purpose in my challenge. As I explored the practical options of dealing with the issue, I made a conscious effort to listen more attentively to the intuitive messages that came my way.
One that showed up was a message about the Law of Mirrors:
“When people insult you, don’t take it personally, but do listen to their words. They are telling you how they see the world, and they are telling you the exact negative qualities that they possess. The Law of Mirrors states that one can only see what’s in them, regardless of what is actually present in reality or not. Release the need to defend or try to explain to them that you’re not being whatever-nasty-insult-they’ve-thrown-at-you, but evaluate instead, all of these insults, and realize that this is who they are. Then, decide if a person with those qualities is one who you’d like in your life – or not.”
Further, my friend Adrianna Hirschman shared some of her wisdom: “In my personal experience, the other is always a mirror of ME. If the other is showing negative traits that triggers me then it means I also share the same with them, and that’s why they are showing up in my life, so I can see myself”s reflection on them. The opposite is also true, when the other has positive traits, it means I share those with them…. I have been doing experiments with “mirrors” and I can see that they never fail. Pay attention on what you criticize on others….that’s precisely what you need to change on yourself! It is also very true that people can only see in others what they carry in their hearts. We are constantly projecting ourselves on others and vice-versa.”
The message to me: if the Law of Mirrors rings true, then the business challenge I was facing was simply a mirror of my own inner projection of my old familial pattern of economic scarcity and hardship. My intention the past few years has been to release that old scarcity and exchange it for affluence, prosperity, ease and joy. I have made much progress in this process… so why was this same challenge showing up again? Am I still projecting scarcity? I realized this was an opportunity to practice what I have been learning about the law of attraction. But how could I turn this negative into a positive? I wasn’t quite sure, but I do know that I cannot control other people’s perceptions, beliefs or actions. I can only control my own. Still in a quandary, I took a deep breath and prayed for guidance.
Then another message crossed my path – aTEDxBayArea video of Anita Moorjani, who explained her dying experience, her awakening, her healing, and the 5 biggest lessons she learned in the process. This was exactly what I needed to hear at the time – especially her lesson number one. Here’s some of my notes from the last half of her TED Talk.
5 Lessons from Anita Moorjani’s “Dying to Be Me”
“…So much more exists simultaneously and alongside the things that you can see. So much more exists than what we have experienced. When you flash your awareness on something, it becomes your experience. There can be something else right there, but if you don’t flash your awareness on it, you won’t even notice it. Think of the billions of dollars we are spending on cancer awareness. Think of all the cancer awareness campaigns. Imagine if we put that much money, energy and effort into wellness awareness, what a different world we would have. Imagine if we put all our effort into peace instead of into fighting and wars,
we would have a very different world.
5 lessons Anita Moorjani learned from dying and her choice to return to life:
ONE: The most important thing we have to focus our awareness on is love. One of the things I learned, is that one of the reasons I got cancer, is that I didn’t love myself. That is hugely important. When we love ourselves, we value ourselves. When we value ourselves, we teach people how to treat us. When you love yourself, you find no need to control or bully other people, nor do you allow other people to control or bully you. So loving yourself is as important as loving everybody else. And the more you love yourself, the more love you have to give other people.
TWO: The next biggest lesson I learned, is to live life fearlessly. Most of us are brought up on a diet of fear. We are taught to fear everything. I feared just about everything. People think that fear keeps you safe. That’s absolutely not true. Love keeps you safe. When you love yourself, and when you love other people, you’ll make sure you keep yourself safe and that you keep other people out of danger’s way. Love keeps you much safer than fear does.
THREE: The third thing I learned that is so important, is humor, and laughter and joy. We’re born knowing this stuff. We’re born knowing it’s important to laugh, because that’s what kids do all the time. We’re born knowing love and fearlessness. But it gets conditioned out of us as we grow up. Laughter is so important… and humor… and finding your joy in life. It’s more important than any other spiritual activity that you can think of, and if our politicians learned to laugh, we’d have a very different world. If we had more laughter, we’d have less people with illness, you’d need less hospitals and you’d need less prisons as well.
FOUR: The fourth thing I learned is that life is a gift. It really is. Most of us live as if life is a chore. But it shouldn’t be that way. And it’s unfortunate that only when we lose something that we value do we really realize the true value of it. It took me losing my life to realize the value of my life. I don’t want other people to make the same mistake, which is why I’m standing here sharing my message. Because I don’t want people to realize, when it’s too late, the value of their life. Your life is a gift. Even the challenges that come to you are a gift. When I had cancer, that was the biggest challenge I could ever have. But today, when I look back on it, I feel it’s the biggest gift I could ever have. I thought the cancer was killing me, but actually, I was killing myself before I got cancer. The cancer saved my life. All your challenges are gifts. In the end, you will always find that your challenges are a gift. And if you’re in a challenge, and it doesn’t feel like a gift yet, it means you haven’t got to the end yet.
FIVE: The fifth and final thing which is so important that I learned, is that the most important thing for you is to always be yourself. Be as you as you can be. Shine your light as brightly as you can. Embrace your uniqueness. Just realize and get to know who you are, love yourself unconditionally, and just be yourself. And with those five things, I invite you to go and live your life fearlessly. Thank you very much
Anita Moorjani at TEDxBayArea”.
That first lesson was specifically for me, in that moment. I’ve always been a giver – a daughter, a sister, a friend, a wife, a mother, a healer, a nurse, a caregiver, an employer, a volunteer … and I happily served in all those roles. But eventually, I developed physical illness – brought on by chronic stress… and the basis of that chronic stress was inner conflicts. My physical illness was different than Anita’s cancer, but Anita Moorjani’s story of discovering a spiritual basis for her physical illness paralleled my own… I, too, had been spiritually killing myself. I realized that all my giving had a needy, scarcity component to it – a seeking for validation from others. This did not mean I was a bad person, or that my service to others had been in vain. I simply realized that my illness held a message for me… that I did not value or love myself as much as I should – that I valued others more than myself… and my lack of self love was simply another aspect of the old scarcity mentality.
In gratitude for this increased awareness and understanding of The Law of Mirrors, I prayed again, and listened further.
What could I do specifically toward resolving the challenge with this client? No particular answer was forthcoming, so I grabbed a pen and paper and did a little exercise I had heard about from Esther Hicks. I drew a line down the center of the page. On the top left side of the line I wrote “ME” and on the right I wrote “GOD, ANGELS AND THE UNIVERSE”. Under ME, I wrote what I knew I could do that day… and my little list had nothing to do with the business issue. Under “GOD, ANGELS AND THE UNIVERSE” I wrote a big list of things that I was concerned about, but had no real control over, including this business challenge. With the intention of being open to resolving the issue without legal intervention, I wrote a short email to the client, asking him to call me. Then I gave it all to”GOD, ANGELS AND THE UNIVERSE”, and I left the house.
A few moments later, I received a phone call from the client. I parked safely and engaged in a phone conversation. I was able to be respectful, but I did not allow him to bully me… and he agreed to resume his payments to completion of all that was owed.
This Law of Mirrors message, and the gift in this challenge, is the gift of having increased awareness about more aspects of the old energy that I can now release, and a confirmation that as I trust in Divine Guidance and take intuitive positive action, all will work together for good. I pray that in sharing my experience, that those who read this will be blessed.
Thank you, Thank you, Thank you,
It is done, It is done, It is done.
The Process of Authentic Healing
True, authentic healing is a process more than an event. I don’t know that if, in the human experience, we are ever finished with it. “Line upon line is how this process of awakening to increased conscious awareness and authentic wholeness has been for me.”
A friend once told me “sometimes the only thing holding us back is ourselves”. In my case, it was true. I had let childhood hurts turn into huge fears… and those old things kept popping up through out my lifetime and getting in the way of me going forward and being at peace and happy. Chronic stresses compounded over the years, and eventually impacted my physical health.
The good news is that I found ways to reach out for help and detox from so much stuff.
I am so grateful for the naturopathic and energy healing processes I have experienced… one after another, as I have been led to them, I have been able to release those old issues and feel my spirit more fully “seated” in my body… I feel more whole.
I’m a writer, so in my healing, I developed something I call SoulTalk… where I journal my feelings and experience of using energy exercises for specific issues and release them.
I’ve learned from The Emotion Code, Quantum Touch, Healing the Inner Child, the Figure 8 Exercise, Emotional Freedom Technique, Craniosacral Therapy, Law of Attraction Training, Energy Medicine, Theta Healing, Chakra Healing, Soulprint Healing, Soul Embodiment, Wholetones Music Therapy, and more.
Now, when I find myself triggered, I am able to recognize and identify the specific issues, use these energetic clearing tools to accept and release them, call upon Divine Light and Love to fill and enlighten my body, mind and spirit, and to protect my soul going forward.
As an empath, I’ve also learned to recognize when the emotions and energy of others is affecting me, and know how to deal with it. Sometimes it is a message from ancestors on the other side of the veil, requesting emotional shifts, and I am able to accommodate that and vicariously clear old traumas from past, present and future generations.
In January this year, I focused on a 28 Day Gratitude Practice, which helped me immensely. I found that gratitude brought me to a place of forgiveness… and opened the door to more healing. If you’d like to enjoy the same process, join this group… and scroll to the oldest posts… that’s where to start. It also shows the reference to the book I used, if you’d like that.
I In the process of reaching for and creating my own authentic healing, I have discovered several of my own sacred gifts / spiritual gifts – including the gift of Empathy, Intercessory Prayer, the Gift of Healing and others… I am learning to use these in positive ways. I even certified as a guide for a course called Discover Your Sacred Gifts… and the more I guide others through it, the more clear I am regarding my own.
I’ve learned that when I focus only on clearing things, I can actually create more to clear, so I stay stuck in the past. So at some point, when you feel you have let go of enough personal and generational traumas that you can relax enough to breathe deeply and feel the spirit within you, there is a need to learn to live and enjoy and create in the present.
Though you may feel there are still things to clear, I encourage you to begin a daily practice of letting go of what has come before, allowing yourself to appreciate the small beauties and joys of daily life, and consciously focus on creating more of what brings you joy.
Blessings to all…
“I have the power!”
My 5 year old loved the toy action figures of “He-Man” and the other “Masters of the Universe”. I have a new perspective of that phrase now that I’ve been studying energy medicine, other natural holistic healing methods, the mechanism of the law of attraction and sacred spiritual gifts.
Recently, I had the opportunity to practice what I’ve been learning.
Walking into a public building before the office opened, I “passed through a gauntlet” of people already waiting in line, and heard a plethora of loud angry voices blaming the establishment, the neighbor, the landlord, the prison time, and everything else they could think of … rather than themselves… for their situation in life. Too much information!
I was grateful for the quiet strength of my husband at my side, and as we took our place behind them, I tried to not hear their words by attempting to focus on a digital number game. It was futile. We were subjected to a loud recounting of stories of fear, scarcity, theft, retaliation, anger and how they felt justified in taking the law into their own hands and causing bodily harm to others.
The negative energy was oppressive and beginning to spiral out of control. My husband was unaffected. He has a more broad worldly experience than I, as he worked in a prison setting for 14 years. But this focused, almost threatening energy affected me negatively. I couldn’t think. I couldn’t even speak. As the angry words became louder and louder, I began to feel overwhelmed and short of breath.
Until I remembered that “I have the power”.
I have the power to react or to respond
to whatever situation I encounter.
I have the power to create my own reality.
I am a “master of my own universe”.
And so, I quietly began to use the spiritual and emotional processes I have learned and gathered and developed, to defuse the anger and change the energy.
First, I turned on Wholetones healing music as a calm support.
I kept the volume low. It was imperceptible amid the raised voices, but the music helped me calm my own energy responded beautifully and I felt strong again.
Then silently, in meditative prayer I reached up to the Heavens and requested that Divine Light and Love become present and touch the hearts of all who were in that experience… I visualized a pillar of bright golden-white light enveloping each soul, sending love to each and all…
And within moments, there were changes in the conversation.
Quiet rest between comments.
A lighter feel in the space.
The negative energy cleared.
And no angry confrontations when the office doors opened.
Thank you, Thank you, Thank you.
It is done, It is done, It is done.
It is more true than you may sometimes think,
you are “Master of Your Own Universe”,
and “You have the Power” to reach up, to access divine help,
and send love and light to shift the energy in the world around you.
The Money Magnet
28 Day Gratitude Practice: Day 9 Exercise
“Take any unpaid bills you have, use Gratitude’s Magic Power, and write across each one, ‘Thank You for The Money’. Feel grateful for having the money to pay the bill, whether you have it or not.” – From “The Magic”, by Rhonda Byrne
Join us in our 28 Day Gratitude Practice and feel “The Magic”