Self Esteem

Self Esteem

A beloved friend recently reached out in anguish,
seeking reassurance during a time of self-doubt,
a struggle she has faced since childhood trauma reared its ugly head.

I was slow in answering, because I was away from my desk,
and not immediately available.
When I eventually responded, others had already reached out to comfort her,
but when she saw my post, she reacted with the words –
“Oh – you DO care!”

Yes, dear one, I do care.
My heart overflows with exquisite compassion
that seems to come from somewhere else, beyond my own human smallness.

My husband and I were at the temple that morning,
and my state of being is feeling quite tender remembering it,
for I received such a powerful spiritual witness of The SON at the veil.

During the service, I imagined myself standing before God,
emptying my soul of everything I had been hanging onto…
like a little child would empty his pockets of all his treasures…
turning them inside out as he revealed
the bits and pieces of dusty stuff,
sticks and stones, marbles and string,
wadded up papers and scraggly bits of ribbon…
things he had picked up along his path,
or gotten from others in his meanderings…
pulling it all out, holding it tightly in his fists for a moment,
then laying it all out upon the bench before his father…
hair all mussed up,
smudges of dirt on his face…
standing there…
with nothing left to give…
but himself.

And then in my imagination, the bench became an altar,
and the great hand of God reached down and swept it all away,
scattering my once-treasured trash across the room and off into oblivion!
All those little things I had been holding onto were gone.
I had nothing left to give or to do.
Nothing left to hold onto.
I simply stood there, pockets and hands empty, standing alone before the altar of God.

Whereupon – God reached out his arms,
gesturing for me to climb up onto the altar.
So I climbed up to the cushion on top,
and curled up like a little child asleep.
And then, in my mind’s eye,
the great hands of God encircled the altar,
flowing Divine creative energy completely through me,
cradling me, cleansing me with an immense flow of Divine energy.

In physical reality, I still sat, demurely in my cushioned seat,
comfortable and safe in that holy place.
My mind returned to the words being spoken —
words I hold sacred within my heart.
As the session proceeded and I was asked to repeat the words,
I received an immense personal witness
of the physical and spiritual reality of the Son of God…
and His sacrifice…
for me…
and for all of us.

I do not know all things.
But I know when I am touched in the heart by the Divine – the Holy One.
Tears streamed down my face – I began tapping on my heart –
barely able to speak the words I knew so well…
and for someone who seems to always have a plethora of words,
I found myself nearly speechless…
for hours.

Self esteem…
Self love…
Self appreciation…
Self acceptance…

Oh dear one,

If you could but see the brilliant light that is the truth of you,
Self doubt would never be your foe.
And yet, you live in human form,
Experiencing depths of contrasting emotions…
along this journey your soul chose to take.Good and evil
Pleasure and pain
Sorrow and joy
and so much more…
As excruciating as is the pain,
so exquisite can be the joy.God’s wisdom was that for our souls to gain
the prize we seek while in this realm,
The veil was drawn across our minds,
and we are to walk in faith…
or fear, whichever is our choice.
Yet, we are not left alone and comfortless.
The Light of Christ is in us all,
and The Holy Spirit witnesses of God’s love.If God loves you and me so deeply as to send
His Only Begotten Son
to chart the path for our return,
Then how, dear soul, canst thou doubt thy own worth?Lifetimes are invested in the search for truth and wholeness.
Could the answer already be before us – and within us?
As we align with the Divine to our best ability…
We position our heart to be open,
able to commune with God.

I remember my sweet mother,
just days before she passed,
saying “I can’t figure out what I must do to be able to go.”
And the answer came intuitively:
“Perhaps how to die is not something we can figure out at all.
Maybe the secret of the how is found in simply letting go.”

Surrender.
Trust Divine Guidance
KNOW that you are loved beyond measure.
Continue to seek truth.
For in the truth, shall freedom be discovered.

Inspired Creativity

Inspired Creativity

Inspired Creativity

Self-directed Compassion:
I am so sorry you are so human.
I am so sorry you get so caught up in the effort to control.
I am so sorry no one can do it as good as you do it.
I am so sorry you were not the only one inspired.
I am so sorry for the fear factor.
I am so sorry that smallness of mind can block the light.
I am so sorry that they were inspired too.
I am so sorry that for your creation to live and grow, you must let it go and let it flow.

All of us learn from one another. We “make things our own”, as an expression of what works for us in our own lives. I have adjusted recipes to suit my tastes. I have changed sewing patterns to add or remove features of clothing I sew, or crafts I have made. I have learned from famous writers and written my own not-so-famous pieces. In the garden, we plant seeds from plants that other people have tended and shared. We play music composed by others, and it comes out differently each time. The examples are endless.
 
We learn a skill, then adapt it. Should I have to certify in every holistic modality I ever read about? Impossible! Should that preclude me from using tapping or extending compassion to help someone who, in the moment, would benefit from that exercise and is asking for my help? No. We take the good from what we have learned, and expand upon it, adding our own unique flavor, and then share it again.

Where do “certifications” come from? Energy healing modalities and certifications may or may not be Divinely inspired, but they are man made. Methodologies can be structured for learning purposes, but energy, once freed, simply flows. I have studied many methods, read many books, and choose to certify in those to which I feel guided by the Spirit (and/or I am able to afford).

My goal is to align with the Divine as much as I am able, and follow the Light of the Spirit within. My goal is to experience the joy of inspired creativity.

Universally inspired expressions of love, compassion, kindness, empathy and freedom of thought and expression can never be patented or trademarked – just shared. An intuitive person easily recognizes the truth and power of compassion, and it will naturally flow from them when the need arises.
 
In the past, when I looked to others for validation as to whether or not I was good enough to be loved, accepted, and included, I found that I had to limit the expression of my gifts in order to “fit in”.
 
Sometimes we see an expression of a gift in someone else, and because of our own limitations – our fears – our own small mind – our own inadequacies – our unfamiliarity with what we see – we want to diminish or control or limit it.
 
Recently, an associate told me it was not possible for me to be intuitively present and focused on the needs of the person I was helping, to hold the energetic space for them, counsel them, coach them, and to use my gift of writing at the same time – saying something to the effect that only an ascended master could do it, but not me.
 
The old small-minded me would have been all upset at the criticism, and would have believed and reacted fearfully to those words. The present me just acknowledges the feedback and responds with the neutrality of introspective evaluation for the purpose of self-correction. The present me knows that the gifts and skills I have been given are magnified by the Spirit in the moment they are needed to help and serve others. The gifts of the Spirit are universal, and as I expand my understanding, skills and abilities, I am blessed to feel the joy of creative expression when they flow through me.
 
I have found that The Spirit of God within us empowers us far beyond what our small-mind, distorted perceptions of ego, negative habits, or self-defeating belief systems would normally allow.
 
Listening to the Spirit enlarges our capacities to serve and help others. Listening to the Spirit expands our souls and frees our light to shine in unexpected ways – whether for great and grand purposes – or equally as important – for the small, seemingly inconsequential moments that make all the difference to the One.
 
Let us love and honor one another.
Let us live free.
Let the Holy Spirit guide and expand the light of our souls.

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